Carnelian gemstone, helps with focus
There was a point in my time in Los Angeles where I really felt chewed up by this place. A lot of events aligned that brought me to doubt being here. Although I feel like now I am one of L.A.’s cheerleaders, so much so that I have an entire blog about it, there was once a time when I just wanted to say screw it, I am going home.
Now that I am forming relationships with new Angelenos, and hearing their stories, I remember how isolating Los Angeles can be and how overwhelming it is. I remember when I first moved here feeling like a foreign exchange student learning new customs and social mores like:
never saying hello to the person you pass while walking down the street or-
being late 101
One person echoed the statement that I hear so many of the disenchanted say “I just haven’t found my people yet.” After the reason I moved here disintegrated, I too found out how soul crushing it is to date in L.A. I get sad now when I hear when people say that they wished that they never moved here. I just went to another leaving Los Angeles party last week. I remember being at that place once, the give up place, compounded by other reasons I won’t go into. My turning point, and one I am not all together endorsing follows.
A friend saw how much I was struggling at the time and suggested that I see a psychic. She consults often with people who have the sixth sense, oftentimes getting the last word from them about career and relationships. I am not knocking it but, I don’t exactly believe in it. I thought “If I am going to leave here, I am going to do this very L.A. thing before I go.” Psychics, like therapists, are everywhere in L.A., I guess there are a lot more people here looking for answers.
My appointment with “The Psychic” was on a Saturday at an inconspicuous house in Alta Dena. The waiting room was once a dining room in an amazing craftsman house and is now a gift shop selling books, jewelry, and loose gemstones. When it is my turn I walk into a kitchen, sit across from her, and am asked to clear my mind and think only about my questions. First she reads me, gets a lot of things right (I love music, but not dancing) and also gets a lot of things wrong (I am an animal lover.) She then tells me my future and addresses all of the uncertainties that were happening in my life without me having to tell her what they were.
In the end it was all rather silly, of course the man of my dreams would come and we would move closer to the ocean. I would, of course, have success in my career and all the other things that psychics promise you and me and everyone else. It was exactly what I needed at the time, to see from an unbiased and positive learning perspective. To see that my world was actually full of possibilities and different avenues I could take. Before I was spinning and was lacking focus. I kind of needed to be told what to do, by someone who had no interest in my life whatsoever. I left there with my head not being so noisy on the inside.
Coincidentally picked the focus gemstone on my way out as a parting gift that was included as part of my paid session. I still have it (pictured)
In the end, I ended up staying. Was it her that helped me to stay? Not exactly, but that session helped me to pick the path to not move on because I really wanted to be here.
When I celebrated my nine year L.A.nniversary on January 19th I thought about that time in my life, five years ago, when I was ready to leave.
Next up: THIS POST IS TOO LONG AND INTROSPECTIVE, TO BE CONTINUED…